Grieving and Bereavement

Grieving after bereavement is a lonely business...

I personally found that I had to make the pain of bereavement count for something. In psychic sessions from several top-class mediums my wife insisted that her early death was planned and had specific meaning and intention. She merely used the cancer as a way to go. If it hadn't been cancer it would have been something else.

Obviously it was not all about me, though it certainly felt like it sometimes in my state of depression and loss. On the other hand my part in the events was all about me, for we are all at the centre of our own universe. We had six children, (in fact seven when I discovered a still-born daughter was alive in the spirit world.) She had other relatives and friends who were touched by it as well.

We do receive comfort, but for the main part grief is endured alone. You can be lonely in a crowded room, and often that is our experience.

The traditional Christian belief is that those who pass over, provided they are "saved", are asleep in the arms of Jesus awaiting the resurrection of the dead and the Great Judgement. The "saved" have nothing to fear at the Judgement, but the unsaved are in for a very bad time for ever and ever.  Atheists tend to believe that beyond death is oblivion. In my lifetime I have believed all of this at different times.

What I discovered as I searched however was that none of these things are true. My wife and other relatives and friends showed themselves to be fully alive in bodily form. They are fully aware of us here on earth. In fact, their own "space" is probably on or around the earth in a dimension that is invisible to us. They are still the same personalities that they were here on earth, though still developing and learning. They have to "wind themselves down", as it were, in order to communicate with us. We probably don't get the full picture of who they have become.

If you dispute the idea of invisible reality just think about this: your thoughts are real....yet they take up no space and they cannot be seen. Your knowledge grows enormously over a lifetime yet your head doesn't get bigger nor does it feel too full.

There are spectrums, or spectra,  of light and sound that once we did not know about. There are bound to be more of such realities that are still invisible to our earth perception.

Love is the great bond between us and our lost loved ones. The emotional power keeps us in touch.

For those losing a spouse whom they didn't like, there is no coercion to join up again. Matters can be sorted and each can go their own way.

If a spouse remarries and has another strong loving relationship like the first, it is totally possible to split oneself off in the afterlife and continue with both relationships. There are no limits to the soul.